it's been a long while, too long, yet, as i decided i wanted to write something, i really don't know what i want to say.
my mind a funnel, an ever whirling wind of ...well just that, full of wind.
i heard a line from a song, "all i want is today".........yeah, that is precisely what i want.....but really what is that?
each day seems to be a new struggle to get going. I am no longer that engine that could, I am that jalopy, that spits, sputters, and rattles getting ready in the morning.
i need caffeine, and alot of it each day.
i take less and less time in the morning to get ready, as sleep now seems more of a priority. yet...i've gotten more sleep in the last year, than i have in many years past.
i say a small silent prayer every morning before I turn my computer on at work, that no one will yell at me, and TODAY will be a good day.
i wish i didn't rely on 'wishing' so much.
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